Some serious (and some not so serious) questions about yoga...

Since moving to Pennsylvania, my new workout routine is based solely on something wonderful I've discovered - fit tv. Jason and I get about 10 real channels on our television (plus 100 more informercial and home shopping channels), but one of them is fit tv. For those who don't know (because I certainly didn't), fit tv features many different trainers and lots of choices for fitness activities.

I've always liked workout videos (I even remember doing them as a kid at my house and at my Granny and Papa's house), but the one fall back is that they get kind of boring. I love the Biggest Loser videos, but those are my mom's so I don't have them for my use anymore! The best thing about fit tv is that you can always find something new and different to try. There have been a few repeats, but they are spread out so far (usually by 2 weeks) that it's okay.

My usual routine is to do the All-Star Workout at 9 in the morning. Sometimes my friend Kate comes over, sometimes I do it on my own. It's great fun - we've learned belly dancing, Afro-Latin dancing, some Pilates/yoga combinations, and some cardio sculpting classes. It's a different trainer each day, and it's fun and interesting.

There is a show on a few times each day called Namaste Yoga, and I've been a little bit intimidated by it. It's serious yoga. I've done plenty of classes that incorporate yoga inspired moves, but this is something altogether different. It's incredibly serious and difficult looking, plus there is no leader, just a whispering voice. I've avoided it for almost four months. Too much for me!

But today, I turned on All-Star Workout and was so sad. The host was someone who really annoys me, plus it involved a lot of equipment that I don't have. So I went to the tv guide to see what my options were and found a cardio sculpting class. This class was only a half hour (All-Star Workout is one full hour) so I figured I'd do the class after as well. It was... Namaste Yoga.

Now I'm done with the yoga class. I feel relaxed and stretched, but I do have a few questions....

(Disclaimer: I do not want to offend anyone who does yoga, but these were the actual thoughts that came to my head during the past half hour. Some of them obviously do not require answers, but some of them I really would love to hear people's thoughts!)

1. Why exactly is the host lady whispering? I'm sure it's supposed to help with the whole relaxation thing, but I could barely hear her. And being a beginner yogist yogaer (What do I call myself?!) yoga person, I need those instructions. So I turned the volume up. However, being a television show, there are commercials. And at the first commercial break, I just about lost my hearing because I had the volume turned up so high. So, now I'm just wondering, you know you're on TV? Why must you whisper?

(Speaking of commercials, this was the only show I've watched that didn't ask you to keep working during the commercials. Most of the instructors leave you with one instruction and ask you to do it for the entire commercial break which is quite long. Kate and I plop on our butts and sit for 3 minutes. It's heavenly. I wonder how many people actually keep working.)

2. Will I still get the same benefit during this yogic workout if I'm wearing flannel pajama pants as the lady on tv wearing her underwear? It's cold here people! Plus I'm doing this in my living room, right in front of my husband's school playground. I don't think I should be prancing around in my underwear in practically a public place. Plus it's cold. (I feel it's necessary to say that again.) So to summarize....

Yoga lady....

Me...

Do you see why I'm concerned??

3. Is the Warrior 3 pose a joke?? I know, I know, it gets a lot harder, but is this for real? Because I have a sneaking suspicion that these girls were held up by invisible harness, and I want to know where I can get mine.

4. Why do I keep having to touch my third eye? I know what it is, but I don't understand it. What I am doing, and how does it help me? (Also, I just googled third eye and found this. It freaks me out.)

5. Can I do yoga if I'm a Christian, or I am worshipping some Eastern god without realizing it?

6. Is it bad that my favorite yoga poses are the ones when you're laying flat on your back and barely moving any muscles? I know that's part of the relaxing stuff, but I could do that for the whole half hour and be so happy! I mean, honestly, which would you choose?

Relaxation:

Danger to your body:

Relaxation:

Danger to your future children:

I think you get it.

Answers, please!